I HATE YOU !!!

The words you never want to hear your child ever say to you because it stings.  I know being 7 is tough and while I know what we are going to do is for the betterment of him it's still eating my heart out.

About 2 months ago (right around the first report card for this school year) we got a feeling that Hayden was not being challenged at school and possibly falling behind what is expected for grade 2.  It wasn't really one thing but many signs for us.  So we had him independently  tested last week and while super smart in some subjects is behind in a few core subjects.  Particularly ones that he does not like and has no interest in.

He has been in a small private school for the last two years but unfortunately this may not be the right setting for him after all.  While we have continued to ask them to push him academically it just doesn't appear to be happening.   My belief with private education is when there is a price tag attached it becomes a business for the owners and why would any owners want to piss off their customers or/clients.  I could be totally wrong with that statement but it is what I feel.

We are trying to respect Hayden but we also need do what is best for him.  For kindergarten he went to a program that falls under our public school system and we absolutely loved it.  He did well and learned an incredible amount.  But sadly for grade one we were informed due to space issues within the school they were going to be put 35 kids in one room with 2 teachers.  One of Hayden's weakness is he is easily distracted so we made the tough decision to remove him and place him at is current school.  He would be one of 10 in the class but sadly we are still getting reports that he can become distracted so did it really solve the problem.

Faruq contacted his old school yesterday as we had heard rumors that they had moved the grade 5 and 6's out of the school thus creating more room for K to 4 classes.  The new principal was lovely when he talked to Faruq and said they had in fact moved the students in the higher grade to another school which now enabled them to have 5 separate grade 2 classes with the average class number 20.  They would be more then willing to accept Hayden back for next year.   We have a meeting set up for Thursday to discuss it further.

There are a lot of perks to going back for Hayden now he gets up at 6 and leaves with Faruq at 7 but in the new school he won't have to get up until 7:30 and be there for 8:55.  Because of the physical location of the school I would be able to get him or he could take the bus home but either way he would be home by 4 not 6.  He already knows the kids so it's not like going to a completely new school.  The principal also explained that they have different levels within the grades so he would be tested in May to see where he would fall.  Hopefully, it's on the higher end where we expect it to be and then maybe he would be challenged more in the coming year.

So last night we sat Hayden down to have the conversation about moving back to Brentwood.  Well to say it didn't go well was an understatement.  He likes his school and the kids there.  He loves his teachers but we tried to explain they would all be changing next year and told him who he would be having that seemed to ease it a bit.  He said we were mean and didn't love him which broke my heart.  Little does he know we are only trying to do what is best for him.   His final statement before heading to bed was "I HATE YOU BOTH".  Somedays being a parent sucks and this would have to be one of them.

I found out last night that yesterday was called "Blue Monday" and is supposedly the worst most depressing day of the year.  Well it certainly felt that way in our house but today is a new day and I'm hoping for it to be better.

I spoke to Faruq this morning and he said Hayden is starting to be more accepting to the idea.

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3 comments:

We Are the Lucky Ones said...

what a tough thing to deal with!! As a teacher of students with attention problems I think that you are making a good move. It seems with the new school his school day will be much shorter. For a child with attention problems this can be key to success. good luck!!!

Jenn M said...

That sucks. It is so hard when you are pretty sure you are doing what is in the best interest of your child, but they don't see it that way.

Sorry you got the hate word. It is never a fun one.

Soshayna said...

Oh Michelle! I am sorry...that does sting and he certainly does not feel that way (I am sure you know this) and is likely only using the strongest language he can think of to voice his displeasure. The change sounds like it would be great for him in the long run and when he gets there will wonder why he fussed at all...hugs!